'Great Fun!'
Barbara Windsor
'Amusing'
Peter Rogers
'I remember recording a film last week but not allowing for the news in the middle, the tape missed the end of the film. In the most heartfelt sincerity and kindest possible way, I want you to know that you have personally been responsible for emotions a hundred times stronger.
I have just finished reading Carry On Corsets in one fabulous go and been compelled to drop you a line to offer my most enthusiastic congratulations. It only took until I read the cast list for my first laugh out loud. I was easily able to picture the scenes and hear the voices each with their original expression and tone.
I could actually see the film playing in my head and I do feel that I have just seen the 31st film in the series. I think your script reads even better than some of the original series from the 1970’s. It is a truly remarkable piece of work. Give me more!!'
Adam Fortune. Middx
Set in the classic time of 1972, this adventure is about a battle between the ancient and respectable company of corset makers owned by Sir Cyril Strumpet The Third and his arch enemy, Sidney Rabbit who sets up his own company Aphrodisiac, a place of swinging, knicker-clad females. The cast I've deemed to be:
Sir Cyril Strumpet The Third--Kenneth Williams.
Lord Strumpet--Peter Butterworth.
Frederick Hofen-Stoffen-Hoffen-Stoffen--Jim Dale.
Miss Demi More--Hattie Jacques.
Mr. Muff--Charles Hawtrey.
Sidney Rabbit--Sidney James.
Bunny Rabbit--Joan Sims.
Munchie--Bernard Bresslaw.
Ever Perky--Barbara Windsor.
Libby Rabbit--Patsy Rowlands.
Mr. Tesy--Frankie Howerd.
The Reverend Thrush--Kenneth Connor.
Anton Cashmere--Leslie Phillips.
Harmony Didit--Esma Cannon.
Miss Tumbledown--Valerie Leon
Here is part of chapter one;
The town of Peakingdale in the summer of 1972 was enjoying the best heat wave in living memory. Each evening, just after sunset, a brass band played in the park for a few hours and was always well attended by the older citizens while the local council, seeing a chance to fill its coffers with extra cash, issued special licences to the nightclubs, bingo halls and cinemas which allowed them to stay open until late.
Yes, after dark, Peakingdale flooded with people enjoying the barmy weather. They filled the pubs and restaurants to overflowing, young lovers walked the many secluded footpaths that crisscrossed the outskirts of the town and the butchers did considerable business supplying extra meat for the many barbecues that people lit.
Bingo hall patrons sweated, people lazily sat in their gardens until bedtime and policemen napped in their patrol cars, it being far too hot for anybody to get up to any mischief. At least of the illegal kind.
However, behind the car park of the Post Office, a Morris minor was parked with its headlights off. Mr. Perry, a local night watchman had watched the car drive in there and had followed it with curiosity as it had parked in one of the darker corners. He had correctly guessed what the occupants were getting up to but had graciously left them alone. It wasn't his business if they wanted to get hotter than it already was.
But sometime after ten, he took a stroll around the perimeter of the building he was charged with looking after and thought he might check on the Morris. Despite the driver's window being down a few inches, the windows were so steamed up that he could not see inside. But after hearing what the occupants were saying, he frowned.
At first he heard a young woman's edgy voice. "Sidney? How comes, whenever we're alone, he has to come out?"
The man had a ready answer. "Ever, He's my best friend and he makes me feel secure."
"He doesn't make a lot of noise does he?"
"If you try slapping him around a bit, he will."
"He's ever so big. How comes he's so big?"
"He can't help it. That's his way."
"I still don't think it's natural."
Mr. Perry was about to put a stop to what he thought was happening when he heard the girl continue their conversation.
"I mean, bringing your bodyguard along on our dates. You're be bringing your wife next."
"Oh I defiantly won't be bringing her along."
Ever Perky turned back to face the front after glaring at Munchie, a huge, dull-faced, silent man who took up nearly all of the space in the back of her little car.
"Oh, why?" She pouted dramatically.
Sidney put his arm around her. "She won't fit in the car!"
And because she could see the twinkle in his eyes and because his craggy face showed that he really cared for her, she descended into giggling which lasted for some time.
She was a curvy blonde girl, not quite twenty-one and had an infectious chuckle that came out of her quite spontaneously. She had a cute button for a nose, long eyelashes and luscious lips that were always painted in the latest colour of the day. Her skin was like milk and she had about her, an irresistible quality that men fell for on sight. Sidney described her as being, as welcome as a vat of bubbling whisky.
The rest of her body matched her personality as well. Although she was amply built with a larger than average bosom, an average small waist, slightly shorter than the average girl and of average intelligence, there was nothing average about Ever Perky.
Undoubtedly, her best feature was her ability to always see the best in everyone and everything. Despite her voluptuous figure and hair colouring, she was both coy and shrewd. Although she enjoyed Sidney Rabbit's elicit company and knew exactly what he wanted, she knew he would never get it. She continued with her pouting.
"Sometimes Sidney Rabbit, I think you only want me for one thing."
"And what's that my little starlet?"
Ever allowed herself to snuggle gently into his arms. "Well if you don't know then I'm not saying!"
"That's my girl. You keep the world guessing. We don't want to go public yet."
And that was a carrot that Sidney often dangled in front of her.
"When are you going to leave your wife then?" Ever asked from deep inside his chest knowing only too well what the answer was going to be. Sidney began to stumble over his words then as if he had suddenly developed a cough.
"Well, yes...soon. Everything's going so well at the moment. Business is booming, sales have never been higher."